Hi @A myALZteam Member! I know what you mean, your husband is loving and well-intended but not reliable to care for you. If you both start working on it now, you may well find people you like and are comfortable with that can help him without the cost of a professional. We have friends from church and our neighbors coming over frequently to spend time with my mom. When we have to be gone for a short time or need a break, we have people who can step in and know how to handle her. Regina, make a list of your friends and family and start asking them to hang out with you regularly so they can know your needs. They can help your husband fill those needs once you are no longer able to manage them yourself. It's good to spread the net wide in the beginning. When he really needs routine help down the road, he can pay someone to help as well. It's much more reasonable than placement in a memory care place.

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A myALZte...

Hi Regina! I used to live in Manteca. I was diagnosed at 74. W/Alzheimers MCI (amyloid plaque.) this year diagnosed with severe ADHD. I totally understand your concerns regarding your husband. Valid and you need someone that can focus on you and your needs.
I’m so happy I found this forum. I don’t feel so alone. Many blessings on this significant journey.

I hear you and I feel your concern, this is a new world you are stepping into and it can be scary to think about the unknown. It’s all going to work out, try to enjoy living in the moment, the right now. Be well and be blessed.

Do you have children that can step in? I have a similar concern, and to be honest my husband even has concerns, but it's his "duty" he believes. I have a son and daughter-in-law near by and they can step in and at least help. I'm also considering agencies that offer services inside the home, so that way I can stay home and still be cared for. I keep hearing from medical staff that not everyone gets to the end stage of Alzheimer's which also concerns me...but that is another thought for another day. I did see where someone else suggested talking with a social worker. My personal thought is it's your journey and you need to take the journey as you see fit...not how it pleases anyone else. While you're lucid, check all the options and choose what makes you comfortable and fits your budget...that is what I'm trying to do now.

I’m on the other side of that. My husband was diagnosed and refuses to acknowledge his condition. He won’t read about it or talk about what our future is. I wish I was taking care of you.