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A myALZteam Member asked a question 💭
Madison, AL

My husband no longer drives so he goes everywhere I go in the car. At home, he follows me
If I go into another room. Someone said I am his security blanket and I can see that but no one on here has mentioned this. I cannot leave him alone and if I do go somewhere my son stays with him
and he tells me he paces in front of a window the entire time.

March 7, 2023
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A myALZteam Member

My wife did that early on, I told her she was my shadow. She didn’t walk very well at the time but I could always hear her shuffling along to see what I was doing.
It was very annoying for me at the time, especially when I was trying to get things done….. until she couldn’t do it anymore. When she lost interest in her surroundings there was a huge void.
After so much loss, I tried to tell myself, whatever drives me crazy today, will be sorely missed tomorrow.
I can still see her smiling face as she rounds the corner to the kitchen, as I say, ‘Here comes my little shadow.’
As bad as the aggressive agitation stage was, in a strange way I even miss parts of it, because there was still something inside her fighting this monster.
Her sisters noticed when they were visiting that she would watch me the whole way out of the room or when I was around, she would always rely on me to help her finish her sentence or answer a question.
It’s a double edged sword, they depend on us and need us but that can, at times, turn into resentment as well.
Try to find enjoyment in everything, it’s hard, but if you’re like me you’ll miss it when it’s gone. 💔

March 7, 2023
A myALZteam Member

My husband follows me around too and sometimes just paces. He wants to help but can’t He wants to converse but can’t. I can’t leave anything out cause I may not find it again like the tv remote so I’m hiding those.

March 8, 2023
A myALZteam Member

Hi Spankie,
My husband follows me around also, to different rooms, stands outside my bathroom, peeps around corners. You are his security. As long as he can see you he feels safe. Its part of the progression of Alzheimers. Im so used to it now it seems normal and I know Ill miss it when he progresses even more and stops. 🌹😊

March 8, 2023
A myALZteam Member

My husband does this in phases. He used to always walk to my car when I pulled up and tell me he missed me so much. Now he will shadow me in kitchen at times and when out will walk right behind me. If I stop he'll run into me and blame me for stopping. I agree with Mark, I'll miss it when it's gone.
He will stick his head in public restrooms and has gotten store staff to come in to find me. His concept of time is seriously out of whack.

March 7, 2023

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