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Real members of myALZteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

When Did You Know It Was Time To Put A Loved One In A Memory Care Facility

When Did You Know It Was Time To Put A Loved One In A Memory Care Facility

I have been caring, living with my Dad, for several years now. A few weeks ago he has gotten to where he doesn't know who I am or my husband. We have a caregiver in home 3 times a week so that I can go to work as he can't be left alone anymore. It is really hard on us all and I am beginning to wonder if it is time to move him to a care facility. I guess what I want to know is what were the signs that you knew it was time and you felt comfortable in doing so?

posted almost 4 years ago
A myALZteam Member said:

My Dad was diagnosed in 2013 but this past year or so he has got worse as each week goes by. He was still at home with my Mum but she was at breaking point. My Dad would be up 4 or 5 times during the night trying to get out the front door saying he wanted to go home. She wasn't getting much sleep if any and then had Dad to deal with in the day and she couldn't leave him on his own. To cut a long story short my Dad went into a care home last Saturday. You say you have been caring for your Dad for several years. If he doesn't know he is home, doesn't know who you are etc I think it's time. You maybe could carry on as you are but in the end your health & well being will suffer. You have done really well to have looked after your Dad for so long.

Good luck if you do decide to move him to a care home.
xXx

posted almost 4 years ago
A myALZteam Member said:

I am trying to make the same decision Tricia. This week when he started to urinate and defacate anywhere and everywhere I know the time has come. I think when you get to that point. Good luck making your decision.

posted almost 4 years ago
A myALZteam Member said:

I’m at the point of trying to figure out the same for my mom and trying to figure out how to get my dad to accept that he will have to put her in a home to save his health and well being. 😞 my mom is now scared of my dad at times and does not recognize home as her home- hasn’t for a very long time now, and most days is not recognizing my dad.... what do I do. I am not close enough to come help out like dad would like and mom has tried walking out 3 times already recently... she is depressed and cries a lot. It is so sad. What do I do?

posted over 3 years ago
A myALZteam Member said:

I think many of us struggle with the decision to put our loved one in a dementia care unit, a board and care home, or assisted living. I have been struggling with this for awhile. I want go go a vacation. Last year it cost me $4K for care for him for 7 days. Do I spend all the $60K I saved working on his care so I can get away? What happens if I need the money to pay for my care ? So many questions so few answers.
I am having trouble thinking straight myself. I know alz is not contagious. I just want to crawl into a hole and die. But then he will be alone.

posted over 3 years ago
A myALZteam Member said:

I think it’s when you’ve exhausted all resources and he’s beyond your help. Then you can visit him and make sure his needs are being met. ❤️

posted almost 4 years ago
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