How do you cope with "Sun-downers". My husband wants to go "home" everynight. He even packs things he is taking with him. Every trick I know does nothing to help.
I saw that I posted a year ago.. My mom started getting dressed at times in the middle of the night to go home. It became so difficult for me as I wasn't getting any sleep and had no help. Her memory just was slipping so fast. Today she is in a wonderfully facility and has great caregivers that she loves. I had such a hard time with my own guilt for putting her someplace besides home. I tried bringing her home to our house. We have 20 steps up to our front door. She would have her bag on her shoulder and said its time for her to go home. She did this 20 or more times a day.. And all during the late night hours. You can put alarms on the doors and floor pads that alert you they get out of bed. Bringing her home lasted 30 days and I decided it was time. Its been almost a year now. Alzheimer's has been the hardest thing for me in my life. My mom still remembers me, I am thankful for that.. I know its coming, the day she doesn't. I wish there was a magic answer to the effects of how to handle effects of Alzheimer's. I love this site, as you get many options to try.. My heart feels your pain.. Hugs and let God guide you.. No Guilt... Just your best is all
I usually have patio curtains open during the day allowing my husband to see the sunshine and bright days. His bed is situated where he is able to see outside from his bed. However, before the sun goes down I turn on the lights and I the close the curtains. My lights are on until he falls asleep. He never sees the sun going down or see it getting dark outside. There has not been any Sundowning. This has worked for us thus far. Every morning I open curtains to sunshine. Be Blessed. Us
MIL can get anxious. I read about 7 years ago about light in the house come dusk and we have timed our lights in the living to go on about 4 pm. Give her a little sweet snack and refill the juice glass and that seems to work. News goes on at 5 and she cannot pry herself away from the TV. after dinner everything seems to be fine. My sons (3) have suggested CBD oil which is legal in Washington state, if her anxiety gets too bad. So we have that yet to try. She is only mobile with a walker and we have both a chair alarm, bed alarm and baby monitors so we know if she decides to get up. The only time she gets up from her chair anymore is if both my husband and myself are absent from the room. She can’t explain why and usually doesn’t know what she wants to do so I am sure it’s a feeling of being left alone. And in some cases like small children who know certain things are off limits she gets into things that do t make sense or trues to navigate without her walker. We are always within earshot and not more that a minute I’d two away so we prevent disasters.
One time I’d left some waffles to cool onna rack on my kitchen counter (we have a semi-open floor plan) and she’d managed to get three of them and get back to her chair🤣🤣😂😂. One way to get her to eat. Leave food so she thinks it’s contraband. Anyway. Lights on from dusk to bed seems to work to alleviate her specific sundowners anxiety proneness.
I just tell mom she promised to spend the night with me and help me with x y or z and I would really be sad if she left right now. I make a promise to take her home first thing in the morning. It works for me.
The Volicer Research in 2001 helps us understand that we want to get the temperature up and the heart rate down. So any combination of these focused on the preferences of the individual can usually bring them significant comfort. A steamed milk and 60bpm music; folding warm towels; a warm snuggle and stroking with a beloved pet are just some creative ways to help these circadian rhythms get closer together. It's agonizing to be cold with a fast HR, high BP, and fast respiratory rate. It's no wonder people exhibit fight, flight and freeze behaviors; they don't even feel like they belong in their own skin. Best wishes to you <3
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