Hi Patience
I am like you. You promise in sickness and in health but where do you go when your own health is suffering. I have had three heart attacks and six stents put in and am taking too much angina medication. There sometimes comes a time when we can't cope. It would break my heart to put him in care.

I feel for you - my husband is only 68 and has had dementia for at least 3 years. I wish I knew what to do and I have been a disability support worker in the past. In your own personal life it is a lot harder. It's getting a lot, lot harder - just seek as much help as you can to help you get through this, as I will do.

Back at you.

Independent minded stubborn people with dementia added are difficult to manage.
Plus young at heart and don't fit into the pitiful services if any available

Deep breath and just go with the flow.
Know there are people here who understand x

I agree with Jan, can you move back, I would not cope to hear my husband kicking and screaming, it would break my heart forever. my situtation is different to yours, i am a wife and promised, in sickness and health. With your dad, you need to consider your life when planning for your dad, good luck xx

My husband (early to mid stage) knows our plans (which could change), but I hope to hire a friend to come and sit with him, or have one of our two daughters sit, when I need to leave the house. Eventually will take all his keys away. So far, he doesn't want to let go of his finances, but our Oldest will be Power-of-Attorney. We have long term care insurance, but I just get tired, thinking about the future, so try to take things one day at a time. Meanwhile, we live near a fine Nursing Home, where he knows he may go eventually...we shall see. It's entirely up to each family to decide. My Father-in-Law tried to take care of his wife, way too long and the doc eventually had to tell him to put her in a home, cuz it was killing. He eventually died of a Massive Stroke, 6 years before she did - very sad/sam