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Real members of myALZteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.
January 25
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A myALZteam Member

My husband was like that so I started using Depends on him. I called them “underwear”. After a few accidents, he was ok wearing them.

February 5
A myALZteam Member

My husband does this too. I started asking him if he needs to go atleast every hour. He will say if he does, then I go in the bathroom with him to help him know where to go, in the toilet. It has helped. He's not incontinent, he just needs assistance to help direct him to the bathroom and stay in there with him to show him where. If I dont help him, I believe he thinks he's actually going in the toilet. Sometimes I loose track of time and sometimes he actually will tell me he needs to go, But he needs help with direction.

February 5
A myALZteam Member

Thank you. We're doing our best to monitor his movements.

January 26
myALZteam

What can be done when a husband with Alzheimer's won't use the toilet and urinates anywhere in the house?

This is incredibly challenging, and many caregivers face similar struggles. There are several reasons this happens and practical strategies that can help.

Why this happens:

- He may not recognize what the toilet is Show Full Answer

What can be done when a husband with Alzheimer's won't use the toilet and urinates anywhere in the house?

This is incredibly challenging, and many caregivers face similar struggles. There are several reasons this happens and practical strategies that can help.

Why this happens:

- He may not recognize what the toilet is for anymore
- Memory loss can make him forget where the bathroom is located
- He might not realize when his bladder is full
- Medications, drinks with caffeine, or medical issues like UTIs can contribute
- He may simply not want to be told what to do

Strategies to try:

Watch for nonverbal cues that he needs to go, such as:
- Restlessness or fidgeting
- Tugging at clothing
- Pacing or hiding in corners
- Touching the genital area
- Unusual facial expressions

Set up a regular toilet schedule - take him every 2 hours, after meals, first thing in the morning, and before bed. A myALZteam member shared, "We had to go back to potty training and put mom on the toilet every hour. It seems to help us." Make the bathroom easier to use:

- Remove clutter from the path to the bathroom and around the toilet
- Use simple clothing with elastic waistbands
- Consider a bedside commode for nighttime
- Make the toilet more visible and accessible

Communication approach:

Don't try to reason with him or scold him about accidents. Instead of telling him he should use the toilet, try inviting him to the bathroom for another reason he finds appealing, like looking in the mirror to fix his hair. Once there, he may be more willing to use the toilet.

Talk to his doctor:

Track accidents, bathroom times, and fluid intake for at least three days. This helps the doctor determine if there's a treatable medical cause like a UTI, diabetes, or medication side effects.

Consider absorbent underwear as a backup, though you'll still need to check regularly to prevent skin issues.

This is exhausting work. Caregiver burnout is real - consider looking into local training programs or home health aides to help with care.

January 25

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