When Do I Stop Taking My Mom To Specialists, E.g. Nephrologist, Hematologist? | myALZteam

Connect with others who understand.

sign up Log in
Resources
About myALZteam
Powered By
Real members of myALZteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.
When Do I Stop Taking My Mom To Specialists, E.g. Nephrologist, Hematologist?
A myALZteam Member asked a question đź’­

My Mom is turning 78 this week! She was diagnosed with dementia/then Alzheimers in November 2014. Among other things, her medical diagnosis's include Hemochromatosis and Renal failure (she has 30% kidney function left). Taking Mom to doctors' appointments and having procedures (e.g. therapeutic phlebotomy) causes much distress - physical, emotional and cognitive distress. Her Alzheimers seems to be advancing more quickly recently and she has declined this spring after have a significant… read more

posted May 15, 2019
•
View reactions
A myALZteam Member

No one can make that decision for you - a hard one. Ask yourself what your loved one would want if they could make the decision. As for me, my daughters and I have decided not to treat much of anything other than keep him comfortable by being conscious of a healthy diet and keeping him hydrated. We have decided that prolonging his agony for our comfort is not fair to him. He is on a no-code already. (Hubby and I had talked about this early on). A health directive is in place. The farther down the road we go, comfort measures will be our priority. Hospice will be brought in as well. Medication right now is just to control his anxiety and behavior- not the expensive medications for Alzheimer's that don't work anyway. We will not be doing any MRI's, colonoscopies,etc. Leaving this earthly home with dignity will be the priority.

posted May 15, 2019
A myALZteam Member

I agree with @A myALZteam Member. It is your decision based upon what you see related to the stress/distress and difficulty versus the potential gain. Her PCP should be advising you of that. Ours did. His comment was, "If they found something in any of those visits, would it warrant treatment and could she withstand treatment?" Likely not at this stage. Therefore, we don't go any more. My wife is in long-term care and they still check for sores and do the feet on some schedule to keep her comfortable. That is enough for us. Almost any visits scare her and distress her in every way possible. So we do not do it.

posted May 15, 2019
A myALZteam Member

That decision is hard . Only u her caretaker and herself knows the physical / mental changes she is going thru. I decided to not take my mom to the dentist, eye Doctor, foot doctor. Because it's too much . And that's small stuff.. U r dealing with major health issues..And things will not get better. She wears dentures and I do her feet. Each medical crises she goes thru makes her Dementia worst .. It is so hard to see them go thru changes . Talk to her doctor. Maybe put her on Palative care. 🙏🙏 For ur decision..

posted May 15, 2019
A myALZteam Member

It helps to use quality of life as a barometer. What kind of position did your loved one have when they were of sound mind. This can also help with the guilt we sometimes feel when we are confronted by others opinions.
Every day you do this is a gift to your loved one AND to the ones who can’t/won’t
Help. I have no doubt you will know when enough is enough.

posted May 18, 2019
A myALZteam Member

Amen. As a nurse, I remember the first time a family decided not to give antibiotics, etc. As time went by, I understood that the family made the right decision for their loved one. Some people seek aggressive treatment while others choose comfort care. Never again did I question that course of action. It is a very personal experience for each person with dementia and their families. Hugs.

Melissa

posted May 29, 2019 (edited)

Related content

View All
Are There Any Meetings In My Area For Dementia Caretaker?
A myALZteam Member asked a question đź’­
How Do You Survive Dealing With Someone In Denial, Dominating And Negative
A myALZteam Member asked a question đź’­
Aricept
A myALZteam Member asked a question đź’­
Continue with Facebook
Continue with Google
Your privacy is our priority. By continuing, you accept our Terms of use and Privacy policy.
Already a Member? Log in