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Real members of myALZteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

Alzheimers And No Long Term Memory

A myALZteam Member asked a question 💭
Grand Bend, ON

Many articles discuss short term memory loss but nothing about long term memory loss. My mother does not recall any memories. It's not only surprising but very difficult to converse with her about any subjects since her sort term memory is poor and she has no recall of memories from the past
I show her recent photo's of her great grand children which she loves to see and she seems happy and says how cute they are. We have tried looking at old photo's and she asks who these people are including… read more

November 18, 2017
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Answer Summary

Members shared deeply relatable experiences about their loved ones losing both short-term and long-term memories due to Alzheimer's and other... Read more

Members shared deeply relatable experiences about their loved ones losing both short-term and long-term memories due to Alzheimer's and other forms of dementia, with many describing the heartbreak of not being recognized by spouses of 50-plus years or seeing parents forget their own children. Several members offered compassionate guidance, including avoiding questions like 'Do you remember?' to reduce frustration, living in the present moment rather than trying to restore lost memories, focusing on music and sensory activities over old photos, and recognizing that emotional memory often remains even when names and faces are forgotten. A recurring theme was finding peace in small joys, celebrating when loved ones are happy despite memory loss, and honoring the love that persists even when recognition fades.

A myALZteam Member

When speaking of past events try to not say "Do you remember--------" Naturally, they will not remember and the questions just add pressure. Instead, say something like "many years ago such and such happened" and go ahead an talk about the event. Tell them how fun or funny or beautiful or sad it was without adding the question do you remember. Maybe they will enjoy hearing about it almost as much as they enjoyed living it the first time around. I learned to do this with my husband who could not remember the past.

July 15, 2020
A myALZteam Member

Greetings, I learned the hard way to stop talking about family my mom doesn’t recall at all. She is frustrated or laughs at me that I’m joking around showing her pictures of my dad, her husband for 63 years and tells me that’s not dad. Little by little I’ve removed old pictures of all family except her 4 kids. Me and siblings are the only family she remembers now. I realized I cannot replace or help jog a memory that is gone forever for her. I stopped trying. She’s happy remembering what she can and that’s that. I’ve learned to accept what she remembers. It’s a struggle for you and please know I understand how you feel 100%, sending prayers and strength to cope. Enjoy every day.

August 26, 2019
A myALZteam Member

KelliBarton, they have memories but you have to find a way to unlock their minds. Momma responded at the end to touch and songs or reading the Bible to her. You just have to search for your parents key to the lock.

Now for pain it's a twitch (they never had before), a moan, a wince, watch their eyes and lips pursing or different things. Momma touched my bottom when ever hers hurt (diaper rash) or rub her head whenever her head hurt. It's like watching a baby they normally don't cry they just react.

I hope this helps and my thoughts and prayers are with you!

October 25, 2018
A myALZteam Member

I realy like the analogy of the brick wall we build. The first level is the earliest childhood memories, and we add another level to this wall as we age. By the time we are elderly, we have a very tall brick wall full of memories. But dementia punches holes in that wall. For most people it mean taking a layer off at a time. ie short term memories are lost first, and as the disease progresses another layer is lost. Different types of dementia cause different damage to our walls. Some types wipe out huge chunks, other poke out bricks at random levels. As more bricks are lost, we are left with only the most basic of walls. No more knowledge of past, present or future. At best, some memory of childhood, hence why some people love dolls. Not necessarily as a "child" replacement but simply as a doll as in childhood. As for your mom, her "wall" may now be so small, that even long term memory is no longer there, and showing her photos that are old for you may be distressing for her. My advice, forget trying to get her to remember, and live with her in the here and now, or whatever her reality is. best of luck. XO

February 3, 2018
A myALZteam Member

His dementia has come to a different stage I've see it often in my work ur only causing more frustration by showing photos of people whom he no longer regonises try music they say that part of the brain never dies hope this helps xxx

November 29, 2017

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