Mary, I’m sorry that you and your husband have reached this point. For the last year and a half there has been 3 separate occasions that I felt we were within weeks of the end. Obviously, I was wrong in my thinking. She showed the 3 distinct characteristics of end of life;

-Eating less
-Sleeping more
-Withdrawal from this world

Each time I’ve told myself to get out of the predicting game and accept each day as they come.
Our hospice nurse keeps reminding me that her body needs very few calories in her bed ridden state. She has lost 8lbs in the last month but she has been a little more alert and more aware of her surroundings
lately.
This disease, for the past 3+ years, has a way of giving me glimpses of the future. With each plateau and subsequent drop off, it has a way of showing you what’s coming. Many times I read these signs and assume the worst will happen immediately. Being wrong isn’t a bad thing, it’s helped me to prepare for what’s coming… both practically and emotionally/spiritually.
The books I have read on the subject of end of life, describe death as a ‘birth into a new life.’ I can certainly relate to that. Lately I have felt like an expectant mother with this burst of energy, cleaning, preparing and organizing for the coming ‘birth.’
I guess it’s human nature to attempt to feel productive while dealing with something you have no control over.
I know she is in a fragile state and things can spiral downward very quickly. I spend several hours a day feeding her only to get a few cups of nutrition in her. She’s been eating a puréed diet through a syringe for a few years now. There are days I only succeed in getting a few ounces in her. In the meantime I have put back on my marathon shoes and have prepared mentally for the long haul. It’s easier to keep that frame of mind and try avoid the rollercoaster of emotions otherwise.
I’ve posted it before but these books have been very helpful in understanding what the end of life looks like. Uncovering the mystery has been very helpful for me.
bkbooks.com

@A myALZteam Member it sounds like the end may be near for your husband. Please reach out to Hospice now-they provide so much help and support. I understand why you wanted to have your husband continue the injections for prostate cancer-none of us want to see our loved ones in pain. Hospice wanted to discontinue my husband’s blood thinner Eliquis. Because he experienced a blood clot in his leg years ago, I was fearful that could happen again. Fortunately Hospice agreed to continue that medication to the end. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Mentioned Users

A myALZte...

While he was still of sound mind, my husband created and signed an advanced health directive stating that, in case of a terminal disease such as dementia, he did not want to be artificially fed via any sort of feeding tube. So when he gets to the point of not being interested in eating, I don’t plan to feed him via any sort of tube or syringe. My husband is in memory care and also under hospice care, both of whom are aware of his health directive. So I’m assuming this means his life expectancy will be shorter than someone whose choice would be to be artificially fed. I’m guessing someone could live quite a few years longer, if they are artificially fed.

My heart aches for you. I know the pain you are going through. My husband passed away on March 26th. He was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2016 and showed signs before that. In January of this year, he took a turn for the worse and became combative when anyone touched him. On March 16th he stopped eating and drinking and slept most of the time and passed away 10 days later. Although I will miss him for the rest of my life, I am at peace knowing his pain has ended and this horrible disease no longer controls him. Everyone’s journey through Alzheimer’s is different. Wishing you peace and love! 🥰