@A myALZteam Member I did find a lot of documents, but none that matched exactly what I wanted. So I downloaded and edited. Hopefully, no one will actually put this in front of any lawyers. We took a small risk by not going to lawyers for it, but the family all agrees to what should happen, and the doctors already accept me as caretaker and decision maker. Hopefullly, we won't regret it.

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A myALZte...

Just be sure that if you are the spouse, don’t assume that you will be the one taking care of the finances. You HAVE to be designated as the Power of Attorney. I know. We made the mistake of not designating me on my husband’s form.

Google Free POA forms Virginia.

Thanks everyone. I downloaded forms from a Virginia site for durable POA and the medical advance directive. My parents, my siblings and I got together and filled them out and signed them with a notary. We chose not to use an attorney because of the expense and because we all agreed on who would be POA and who would be successors. No distant relatives to be concerned with. So the only concern would be financial institutions and hospitals. Just to be sure, I'm going to share these now with our primary care physician and banks -- and be sure they accept what we did.

Thanks for the input everyone. Hugs to all of you.

You need POA for financial/legal concerns plus POA fir medical concerns, end of life instructors. I would spend the money if you can to do it right. I had to sell mom’s house and take charge of her finances and medical decisions and used these legal documents or I couldn’t have done it for her. Please please take care of these things soon. Best wishes sandy