My mother-in-law owns her house. I have been told that Medicaid will not help. She is 83 years old and has been diagnosed with large onset ALL with behavioral problems. We have tried to come up with ways to keep her in her own home but she is becoming very combative and sometimes hostile. She wants to pick fights and arguments with the caregivers that sit with her during the day. She tries to make them leave her and her house during their watch. We got her into an adult day care facility 2 days a week now she refuses to step out of the house. It is becoming very hard to keep someone with her during the day. She has seizures due to a brain tumor which is supposed to be small and benign. We are at a stand still with her .We cannot get the doctors to do consult without her in the room and she want let you hardly get a word in with the doctors with her in the room. She keeps asking questions about what we are saying to the doctors and then that takes up a lot of extra time trying to explain to her about all the things that she has been up to.None of her children have a lot of money . So what do we do next. We want her to stay at home but she keeps running everyone off . What do we do next? Please if anyone has any advice or suggestions please HELP us to understand what do we do next. I do not know who to turn to for more info. Thanks for letting me vent and for any info you can give me. Please all have a blessed night and remember that each one of you are special and are loved. And your loved one is blessed to have you taking care of them.

How Do You Afford These Memory Care Facilities

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How Do You Afford These Memory Care Facilities

A myALZteam Member asked a question 💭

My mother-in-law owns her house. I have been told that Medicaid will not help. She is 83 years old and has been diagnosed with large onset ALL with behavioral problems. We have tried to come up with ways to keep her in her own home but she is becoming very combative and sometimes hostile. She wants to pick fights and arguments with the caregivers that sit with her during the day. She tries to make them leave her and her house during their watch. We got her into an adult day care facility 2… read more

posted March 17, 2018

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@A myALZteam Member, I am afraid that there are no easy answers. And each state is different. Here in MO. if you want medicaid to help with the memory care you will have to sell your Mothers house and use all her assets up before you will get on medicaid.If someone has POA they will need to start this process. However the FIRST thing you MUST do is talk to an attorney who deals with this type of law. It is very tricky and if done wrong, she will still be liable for her debt, plus you could be in legal trouble if done wrong..Here in Mo my Mom could not have more then , I believe $ 1800. in her checking account each month after her bills were paid. She could not give her kids money to reduce her assets, She was allowed to use some of the assets to prepay her burial expense. But with no spouse to say that half the house is his there is no way to keep it and qualify for medicaid. BUT check with your local attorney because there might be a way to go around some of these issues. I guess I am saying do NOT do anything til you have talked to an eldercare attorney. In Missouri we also have what they call Area Agency on Aging, which can answer a lot of your question. I would start there, then get the attorney, then start looking for a home for MOM. I know it is hard but doing it the right way from the start will save you all a LOT of stress. Thank goodness my Hubby is a veteran so he is able to go to the VA home when the time comes. It is much less expensive for us that is for sure. Also if you can, check and make sure that your Mom doesn't have a long term care policy somewhere that she paid for and or a life insurance policy that could be cashed in. Just talk to an ATTORNEY! Have a wonderful and as peaceful as possible day! HUGS

posted March 18, 2018

Thank you for the info.

posted March 20, 2018

It is my understanding (at least in NJ) that to qualify for medicaid you have to be down your last $2000 in assets. Exclusive of the primary residence so long as the person lives in the home.

posted March 20, 2018

Thank you so much for the ideas and advice. I will put it into action tomorrow first thing. God Bless. Hope you have a good night.

posted March 18, 2018

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