I talked to my mother in law... She was better at accepting it than we thought. We told her that they were coming in just to see her, they would sit and talk to her or work with her to heat her meals and have really got to know her. I took mum out for a few hours per week so they could go in to clean up the house without moving too many things. Showering was the worse.. Sometimes she refuses to shower and gets angry with me if I push the issue. I have learned to pick my battles, not sweat the small stuff and talk with her, crack jokes and do things with her that I know she enjoys.. I took her to a nursery today and she loved the smell and colours of the flowers. Use her interests and strengths as much as you can. Hope this helps 😊.. All the best.

Maybe have the person come over as a "friend" first for a while a few minutes at a time just to say hello. My dad rarely recognizes anyone so he would simply think its someone from church. I wonder if you made it seem like the person needs your mom's help or even your mom to take care of them instead. Losing your independence and being cared for is likely demeaning for them. Maybe caring for someone else is a better approach. We have learned to say, "I'm your helper." or call his cane a "walking stick." it really does help. All the best.

I find that if I surrender and give control to someone else there is no struggle. I have to stop thinking that I know what is going to happen or what their reaction will be. Instead, I have to let it happen and then deal with it or let others do what they do best.Most times those in the professional role have the knowledge to deal with these situations.

I'm a home carer in my community when I go into client's home for the first time I say the doctor asked me to call by an see if they were ok that gets the conversation going an most of the time they end up making me feel at home

Yes! Some good ways of getting home care workers in and not upsetting the loved one. I have posed as a friend of the spouse that is there to spend some time with them. Have a meal together- brought own or shared leftovers with, accompanied them when attempting to do household chores. Etc,. OR hanging out and looking at the newspaper, watching a favorite tv show or movie. They seem to be oblivious to the real reason I was there.